Broken
by rhiwe
Summary: Just something that came to mind...Ric reflects on a certain brunette, who has made mistakes just like him, and he thinks about just how alike they really are. Not a romance, but definite angst.


Ric Lansing was through pining for women and the "what might have been

_I was inspired to write this because it looked like Ric was sort of checking Sam out on the show today. It came to mind quickly, and I had to write it out. Enjoy._

Ric Lansing was through pining for women and the "what might have been." He'd been through that plenty enough, and he was sick of it. He walked into the Haunted Star, noticing the many patrons who were trying their luck that night. One particular woman caught his eye, and as he walked by, he couldn't help but admire her beauty.

She stood, laughing with her companion, her mocha eyes lit up from within. He hadn't seen that look, that genuine, carefree happiness, in her eyes in ages. He mentally shook himself, focusing on his task at hand.

While he talked to Logan, he couldn't help his eyes from drifting back to her petite frame. Her luscious brown locks were swept up, her tan skin practically glowing in the casino lights. But her true beauty came from within. He knew, because he had played a part in almost destroying that particular beauty.

He remembered the feel of her skin on his, as they had made love—no, as they had had sex on the floor of the home he shared with his wife. He remembered the hurt in her eyes that he was sure was mirrored in his own. They were kindred souls; the two of them, broken and never quite good enough for those they had loved, and that had claimed to love them in return.

She had always caught his eye, but then, she caught the eye of most men with working eyes. But what truly caught his attention was her hidden vulnerability. She hid behind a tough girl exterior, never showing, at least, never really to him, what lay beneath it.

He had known that sleeping with her would ruin him. He knew that he would never taste her skin again, never feel her full mouth flush on his, as he touched her everywhere. He closed his eyes for a moment, reliving that first moment when they became one. For a brief second, he had thought she might have enjoyed it, that she might actually care…but no. He knew as soon as she had turned away from him when they had finished that she would never look back on those memories with a fondness.

He knew she blamed him in part. He knew it was partly his fault. He had been drinking as well, but she had been far worse than he had. He could have—should have—stopped what happened, but he didn't.

He didn't regret it. Oh, he might claim to, but he didn't. That one night he had shared with Samantha McCall had changed him. He wasn't in love with her, but God, did he ever long to touch her once again. There was always a chance, he would start to think, that there might be something there.

But he knew he was wrong. She had had her heart trampled one too many times. She would always look at men like Jason and Sonny as the men she had loved, and look at him as a man she hated. He didn't know how to change her perspective, in fact, there probably was no way he could.

But how he wanted to.

The desire he felt went beyond lust. It stopped short of love, of course he felt some kind of kinship with her, but in no way was he in love with her. His heart only belonged to one woman, a woman he knew to be her biggest rival. But that didn't mean his head never wondered, and his body never longed to be near her again.

She walked out along with all the other customers, and as she walked by with Lucky, she glanced his way. For once, there was no hatred in her eyes. She looked at him, startled to see the heat in his glance, and looked away quickly; up into the eyes of the man she now attempted to love.

But he knew she didn't. Oh, she might love Lucky, the same way he had loved Alexis. But she could never be in love with him. How did he know this? Because he was in the same position. A majority of his heart belonged to one woman: Elizabeth Webber. Just as sure of this, he knew her heart would most likely always remain with Jason Morgan.

They were kindred souls, Ric and Sam. He walked outside, headed for the piers when he noticed the figure which had been occupying his thoughts leaning against the railing of the boardwalk.

Sam turned to look at Ric as he walked toward her, and attempted a half smile. "It's ironic, isn't it Ric? I used to be left alone when Jason went to work, and I never felt quite so alone as I do whenever Lucky gets called away like he did just now."

Ric wasn't sure of what to say, but he leaned against the railing next to her. He took a deep breath, exhaling slowly. Sam looked at him, a question in her eyes, yet not quite on her lips.

Ric met her gaze, and smiled slightly, saying, "I guess that's what happens when you love someone and you know they're never coming back."

Sam's eyes filled with tears, as a look of shock came to her face. One lone tear slipped down her rosy cheek, and she brushed it away angrily. "Lucky will come back."

"Lucky's not who I was referring to."

"I don't know what kind of game you're playing now, Ric, but I'm not interested." She straightened, and started to walk away, but he called her name softly, causing her to stop and turn around.

"I wasn't trying to offend you Sam, or play any games. But I know how you feel. You may love Lucky now, to the best of your ability, but you and I both know who your heart truly is with."

Sam shook her head sadly, crossing her arms as if to protect herself from a chill, although the night was warm and balmy. "How is it that you, Ric, someone I don't want to like, understands me so well?"

Ric walked towards her, and they continued walking along the piers. "I understand you, because I'm the same as you. I know you would hate to admit it, but it's true. What has happened between us, and between others and ourselves is so much alike, it's scary. We're the same, you and I, Sam. We're damaged souls, and the only people who have the capability to fix us are the ones who damaged us in the first place."

"It's a shame, isn't it, that we are so stuck on people we know we can't have? Why can't we get past them?"

Ric laughed, a sad laugh, full of empty dreams. "If I knew that, I would be a much happier person, Sam. But for now, I just do my best to keep on living, no matter what happens."

Sam started to reply but was interrupted by a voice saying, "Sam! There you are."

Sam and Ric turned to see Lucky, walking quickly towards them. "Mac told me I could go, it seems there was a false alarm, but he wanted me to check things out. So we can continue our night as planned." He nodded at Ric. "Thanks for walking her, Ric, but I can take it from here. It's nice of you to not let her walk in the dark, though."

Ric nodded. "You two have a nice night."

Lucky wrapped an arm around Sam, and she looked at Ric for a moment, before saying softly, "Good night, Ric."

He waved at them, leaning against the railing, yet again, thinking of the woman with the beautifully sad mocha eyes, who he knew would never be the one to heal his broken heart. Just like he would never be the one to heal hers. He pushed off from the railing, and headed home.


End file.
